I’ve been away for a few months, but we’re back!
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…It was simple, all she expected from any guy who wanted to go out with her was that he would take care of her expenses; which she listed below as follows…
Her school fees (First Degree Nursing)
And also, she needed a television and air conditioner…
Those were the first words that came to mind, and I was just short of saying it out loud, but I restrained myself and kept an unfazed composure.
At this point, the only thing worse than her list was the fact that she seemed to think she was perfectly within her rights to demand such things!
Truth is I wasn’t the least bit fazed, I had found myself in similar situations many times before, and the template was always the same; play along for a while, flash a few Cedis or create such an illusion to draw her in, and then once she thought she had sucked you in deep enough, you struck first, leaving a clean pair of heels behind you; Classic sucker punch.
This was a previously tried and tested method, with a hundred percent success rate so far, but with Ewurama, I had hit a snag I hadn’t bargained for. She was no novice to this game, in fact she seemed to be so experienced that for each card I played she seemed to have a pack of aces waiting up her sleeve. To start with, I think she realized I wasn’t your average “mugu”, and so played a very patient game with me. What she didn’t know was that I was the spirit of patience itself; I could play the devil to the waiting game and would win.
Days stretched to months and soon enough a whole year had gone by, and all we had done together were a few pizza dates, a couple of visits to the movies and I think that was it.
If she thought I was actually going to pay her fees, when I was scarcely able to afford my own further studies, she had gravely misjudged me, because from the moment those words left her lips, I had determined not to fall victim to this rare species of gold digger.
Naturally, with me not fulfilling the terms of her contract, and with her not giving me any real pressure, we drifted apart, so far apart that it had been over a year we had heard from each other, when I got her text.
“Hi honey. Hope u good? I Know I’ve been a bad partner but I’ve been so busy with some stuff. I’m a bit free now so I thought it wise to contact you so we talk. Forgive me, but I’ve always loved you.”
I instantly recognized this as a scam of some sort, but a part of me felt I had a bit of unfinished business to carry out, and so I responded, and decided to take the game to her this time. I had to act quickly; I was in Accra for the weekend and was due to return to Kumasi the following day.
The plan was to convince her to come along with me, but in order for it to work, I had to create the illusion of me flashing the Cedis around, “abi you know dada”?
Knowing she probably wouldn’t want to travel the long journey by coach, and knowing her taste for the high life, I called in a few favours and managed to get two Star bow tickets to Kumasi.
True to expectation, she didn’t sound at all enthused when I suggested a coach ride to Kumasi. However, when I chipped in the fact that I had two air tickets booked for the purpose, she suddenly became very interested in the trip.
I made the necessary “preparations” both in Accra and in Kumasi for when we arrived; I had a pick up waiting at the airport with my “driver” on standby to take us home. It is in such situations that the most invaluable friends play the most crucial of roles.
On arrival, we were chauffeured first to get her pizza and chicken and then home. When we got home, there was a “messenger” waiting for me in front of my flat with a special order of ice cream for the lady. At this point you could almost touch the admiration in her eyes. I must admit I was mightily impressed myself at the level of first rate acting my most reliable of lieutenants came up with to create such a perfect illusion of affluence and extravagance, which was so crucial to the task at hand.
I escorted her inside to the bedroom and then took leave to see the “driver” off. Back downstairs and in the pick-up, we were joined by Frank, my supposed “messenger” who couldn’t keep back his laughter, ” herh, but chale she fine oo” Sarpong, who was my “driver” agreed with him, ” the chic fine muom” …
We had a good laugh together and then I left them to go back upstairs.
I could hear her in the shower as I entered the hall. It was rather hot inside and so I took off my shirt and with a mixed feeling of excitement and expectation, I headed for the bedroom…